How to Know You're An Outlier

Sep 13, 2020

An "outlier" is something that lies outside of what is considered to be average.

To be average is to fit within what is considered “normal” by popular opinion. Some consider average to be synonymous with mediocre. Mediocrity gives birth to a life of monotonous, laborious routine that is unfulfilling and void of happiness. Happiness can only be attained in the Now. A common textbook example of an Outlier is if you were to calculate the average age in a 3rd grade classroom, you’d exclude the teacher. She/he would be considered a statistical Outlier and removed from calculating the average. Note:  Outliers are removed from the group in order to get a more accurate result.

1. Outliers are usually loners and prefer it.

Outliers are typically loners, not because they actually prefer to be despite their denial of this, but because they’ve typically experienced some form of rejection for their uniqueness. A trauma can range from being assaulted to having your feelings hurt. Dictionary.com reports that the word ‘trauma’ is Greek in origin is first appeared in the late 17th century, in which it was defined as “wound.” Many Outliers have experienced trauma as a result of the typical targeting by others for being ‘different.’ Due to this, Outliers find peace in solitude. In this world of relativity, many times they’ve been told they are not accepted and welcomed. They’ve been penalized socially for being “weird.” All humans desire safety and Outliers seek out safety in solitude. This is a source of strength and area in desperate need of attention. Connection is a human need. We all need to be able to connect with kindred souls, especially Outliers.

2. Outliers rely on their creativity!

Creativity is a result of your inner self being expressed outwardly. Since Outliers spend much of their time alone, they have time to reflect inwardly. The insight from this inward reflection spills outwardly into creative expression. Since Outliers feel they are not welcome in “normal” social circles, they seek out other means to express themselves to the public, from blogs and paintings to graffiti and tattoos. Outliers are prone to these types of expression because it is safer than talking directly to people and risking getting that all-too-familiar “WTF are you talking about” look.

3. Outliers are intuitive!

Outliers are intuitive, in that they can make decisions prior to needing it be consciously rationalized.  Actions that precede deductive reasoning can fall in one of two categories:  impulsivity or intuition. Outliers are not impulsive, though it may appear to others they are. To the contrary, Outliers can be quite calculating in that they’ve decided a formula for when to and not to act prior to relying on their intuition to guide them. Intuitive action is an integral component of being an outlier.

Outliers seek connection with other Outliers through unique and unconventional means!

If you’ve ever heard the saying, “real recognizes real,” this should be an easy point to understand. Outliers seek to connect with other Outliers, but oftentimes not through usual means of communication. Outliers switch back and forth between being introverts for self-reflection and extroverts, typically out of necessity, such as in an employment setting. Because Outliers feel safest when being an introvert, they find other means to reach out. If you’ve ever studied why a wolf howls, you’ll find it is for several reasons. One of those reasons is to distinguish family versus foe. The unique forms of expression that Outliers use is, in a way, an attempt to reach out to other Outliers in a manner that only other Outliers can identify. “Real recognizes real.”

4. Outliers desire self-actualization!

Dictionary.com defines self-actualization as “the achievement of one's full potential through creativity, independence, spontaneity, and a grasp of the real world.”  Outliers' pain is also their blessing. Feeling and experiencing ostracization from others, Outliers are guided to seek answers inwardly and rely on their own internal strengths to navigate life. Whatever we practice, we become. Because of the practice of inward reflection, Outliers stand on escalators of personal growth that propels them forward whether they choose to walk or not.

No one can "do" anything to be an Outlier. An Outlier can only "be."​

My final point is, you are already an Outlier the moment you decide not to engage in mindless group think. The moment you decide that YOU choose what is healthy for you and act accordingly. The moment you realize, despite humans having more in common than we have differences, YOU ARE UNIQUE. To embrace that uniqueness courageously is to experience true freedom. Courage is not the absence of fear but the perseverance and determination to move forward in spite of being afraid. To be an Outlier is to be courageous. We were all born Outliers. Unfortunately, many of us have forgotten that we were born on purpose with a purpose.  You have a purpose and no-one can do you, like you, but YOU!  You have a reason for being. Do not attempt to discover who you are, remember who you’ve always been before you chose to forget.